i feel so unappreciated like fuck kay.

i stood there for half an hour buying donuts for the family.
once i got home, not only did they forgot to top-up my card despite me reminding them but my dad just had to say this,
"kenape tak bilang siang2? kite dah makan. dah kenyang pon."
"how come never tell us earlier? we've eaten and full already."


FUCK

it may not be such a big deal to anyone of you but i fucking bought 11 bucks worth of donuts and wasted half an hour of my freaking time to buy for you these fucking donuts and this is what you say to me. fuck you really! when i don't buy for you, you say all these stupid things like,
"wah go do your hair but never buy for us food."
or
"beli lah kite makan ker, ape ker?"
"buy lah for us food or something?"


FUCK YOU! FUCK FUCK FUCK YOU!


URGHHH... i'm like freaking crying now lahhh..





don't ask me why i'm so fucking emotional over this ah. it's a sensitive issue. i hate to be unappreciated especially from my own family. so what if i don't help out at the shop? i show my appreciation in small little things by buying you flowers that i know you love or buy you shirts because i know you don't have new one's. GOD! why can't you just accept the fact that i'm not going to help out at the shop?! why can't you just face the fact? doesn't matter how many times you ask. the answer will still be no. i know i sound like some selfless bitch but you have to be in my shoes to judge. i don't want to break the ties between us just because of bad business or you did this wrong or money issues. I HATE IT like how i hate politics in families! why can't we just go by our lives without all these? you guys just don't see the unhappiness i see in your lives every single night you guys argue. FUCK YOU!

if i'm going to hell for this, i fucking don't know what to say. it's freaking unfair. if you can't handle it don't go open a new shop! siape yang nak jaga? abang is only doing this fucking stuff because he's paying the debts he owe you for sending him to SHATEC.



fuck it ah! i don't think this post will make any difference.